Religion under Duress

It could not happen at a worse time,
Christmas and all! Danger, danger, danger!

I always thought it a cruel practice,
but students at Luther College used to go out at night
to dairy farms, where the cows were often found
to be dozing while standing upright.
The students would run at the unsuspecting cows
from the side, give them a huge bump,
and tip the over. "Cow tipping" they called it.

Now someone in Italy,
said to be somewhat deranged,
probably a former Luther College student,
has instuted "Pope tipping".
For the second year in a row,
she ran at the Pope, about to celebrate Mass,
and tipped him over. Last year she missed.

The reports do not indicate whether Benedict XVI
was sleeping on his feet, but in his sermon
he urged the faithful to be vigilant.

Now, out in Colorado, another church
assembled the cast for one of those "living creches",
including two real donkeys, kept in a pen at night.

They ran away. They wanted nothing to do
with . . . well, I don't really know . . .
with religion, I assume.
The Colorado faithful tracked them down,
following their trail in the snow,
and brought them back to the faith.

And Catholic Hospital associations have urged
Congress to pass a Senate-like health care bill.
Catholic bishops have been opposing the bill,
arguing that a woman should not have the right
to choose whether or not to have an abortion
if public money is involved. The bill does not say
anything about buggering altar boys.

I don't know. . . .
I don't think medical professionals
should meddle with the medical expertise
of the bishops. Hospitals should stick
to what they know best: the nutritional value
of communion wafers.

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