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Grandfather, . . .

In the Arizona legislature, the Representatives take turns opening each day's meeting with a prayer.  I suppose that is better than admitting that they do not have a prayer.  A few days ago, it  was the turn for a representative who is not religious to offer the prayer. He didn't bow his head, and he didn't say "God", and he didn't say, "In Jesus name".  

 It was shameful!  That is what Steve Smith, who represents Maricopa, said, in effect, so Mr. Smith doubled up on prayers the next day, just to catch up.  Mr. Smith apparently has a fierce desire to make things come out even:  a prayer a day keeps the apple away; that sort of thing.  

 "How do you know that wasn't a prayer?" someone asked.  "Well, he didn't say God!"  Another Representative--a Native American--suggested that in his culture, prayers are not necessarily addressed to Someone.  But Representative Smith admitted that while he couldn't give a really good definition of what a prayer is, he knew one when he heard it.  

 I want to say, as plainly as I can that, in my opinion, Mr. Smith does not know shit from shinola about religion.  He seems not to have a clue that not all religions are theistic; that is to say, that not all religions think that God is a person.  Some religions have lots of gods, big ones, little ones, cranky ones, little personal household gods, Hebrew speaking gods, gods in the trees in Finland, gods with wives and kids, gods that hang around cemeteries, sunshine gods, hunting gods, and some religions do not have any gods at all:  they have auras, and miasmas, abstract philosophical ideas, and things that go bump in the night.  

 Forget, for the moment, the whole idea of the separation of church and state.  Mr. Smith is ignorant about religion, and it shows.  Can you imagine what a cramp he will get the first time the State elects a Muslim to office?  Or a fundamentalist Mormon from up in the Four Corners region who has several wives?  Wait until a Native American begins a prayer by saying, "Grandfather, . . . "

 People who are religious generally assume that their kind of religion is the only legitimate kind of religion. If you pinch your nose when you pray, and bow your head, chances are that you will scorn people who look around when they pray.  If yours is a really good muscular religion, you might very well assume that thanking God means looking up at the scoreboard and pointing your finger at . . . at the God who wants your team to win.  Consider the number of people who think that God ought not to be addressed in Arabic; that God prefers Elizabethan English even to Hebrew, or Aramaic.  

 When people insist that we are a Christian nation, they do not mean your kind of Christianity:  they mean their kind of Christianity.  Are you ready for polygamy?  An all male clergy?  Men as the head of households?  A total ban on abortions, even if the woman dies?  A ban on alcohol?  Pork?  

 Let us face it:  some religious people are ignorant.  So are some politicians.  Some politicians are loony.  So are some religious people.  The founders of our nation said that you can be religious if you want to, but that the nation was not going to be any of them.  Up in Phoenix, if you do not bow your head when you pray, you are considered to have messed up the political process.  But, thank God--thank all of the Gods--we have people like Steve Smith to make up for it the next day:  "Dear God, I ain't looking around, just now.  Are you listenin'?  We are really sorry about yesterday."

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