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Step-Sisters and Smooth Dancers


Our Belle, Michele, was elected to Congress, but she thinks she is there to make straight--especially straight--the way of the Lord.  

Ms. Bachmann reports that the Lord has passed judgment on these United States twice, precisely on the National Day of Prayer and Fasting, in 2001 and in 2012.  I will admit that I am a little reluctant to blame the attacks on 9/11 and the attack on our embassy in Benghazi on God, but Michele says it is no coincidence.  God knows that she is closer to the mind of God than I am!  And you, too, I expect.

In the spirit of not messing with the Will of God, we need to be clear just which God-awful sins have provoked the Almighty to kill so many people and destroy so much real estate.   Michele knows:  she agrees--first speaking generally, and then more to the point--that we are "sliding from moral malaise to cultural hedonism", which is to say, we are supporting "gay marriage and equal rights", and that irritates God just something awful!  Thus, 9/11 and Benghazi!  There are some things that God and Michele Bachmann simply cannot stand, and gay marriage and equal rights are them!  

 Now, Michele does have a lesbian stepsister, and Michele's husband is an awfully smooth dancer, but those things have no more to do with her call for fasting and prayer than do thieving bankers or imaginary weapons of mass destruction.  Let us not read anything more into her call for a diet of prayer and fasting than what she agrees it is:  gay marriage and equal rights.  

 And almost as an aside, I am struck how so many people like Our Belle, once elected to Congress, set off on religious crusades, and how many preachers, once elected to Congress, demand justice for the poor, and equal rights, and honor among thieves--or if not honor, that the thieves at least pay their fair share of taxes.  

 But I digress!  We must not let facts interfere with what Michele wants us to do:  she wants us to recognize that if we don't stop people from marrying whomever they want to, as if they had equal rights, that God will visit his awful punishment upon us and our real estate.  

 I will bet that had the Republican Party had sense enough to nominate Michele to be their Presidential nominee, we would not be struggling, as we are now, with the terrible scourge of step-sisters and smooth dancers!  

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