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The Heart of Darkness, or How Did we get a Black President?

Barack Obama has proposed to talk to school kids
over a nationwide network broadcast.
As you can imagine, parents all over the nation
are rushing to object to this horrifying proposal!

"You cannot do that!" they say.
"The school year is just beginning,
and his broadcast will cut into their recess time!"

That is not their real objection, of course!
Their real objection is this:  if we allow
a Communist-born, Fascist-sympathizing,
war-mongering, bailout-debt-building, socialist,
nose-picking, Portuguese Water Dog owning,
born-in-Kenya and brought up in a mixed-breed
family President with dark skin to talk to our kids,
he will turn them all into Portuguese Water Dogs!

If we let the President talk to our kids,
he will recruit them for careers in socialistic
enterprises such as being a fireman or a policeman
or a public school teacher, and entice them
to think universal health care is a good idea.

He will brainwash them; giving them horrific ideas
about getting good grades and going on to college.
He will, without ever having to say a word about it,
cause our very own kids to wonder why their parents
threatened to pull them out of school if he talks to them.
He will cause our kids to wonder, sometimes,
when they have finished their homework, and lain
themselves down to say their prayers and go to sleep,
how their parents ever got the idea that it was
the President who was madder than a hatter.

This proposed address will destroy the fabric of the family!
It will cause acne among teenagers, and brown stains
in their Daddys' pants!  If the President talks to our kids
about studying hard, dreaming big dreams, and staying
in school, our Constitution will dry up and blow away!

Glen Beck will start to make sense!
Rush Limbaugh will need prescription drugs!
Cows will stop giving Grade-A Pastuerized milk!

As Joseph Conrad wrote in "The Heart of Darkness":
"The Horror!  The Horror!"  We cannot go on like this!

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