The Only Chance I Have

My good humor is often saved by not being a believer.

Right now, for instance, the weather report is that
we will get 15-20 inches of snow today and tomorrow.
I don't believe it--see above--so I shall not despair.

It is true that it has begun to snow--I just heard Mari say,
"Boy, it is snowing a lot more now!"--but the flakes are
small, and they are blowing sideways, so they will probably
end up somewhere over the hill.

Another foot or two of snow is an absurd idea;
hardly to be taken seriously. The ice dam up on the roof
has not even properly gone away.

This does put a lie to all that balderdash about climate change,
doesn't it? The climate is not changing! It is just getting worse!
The ice is melting up in the Arctic, for pity's sake! How can
that explain all the moisture in the air down here in Minnesota;
you know, snow up the kazoo, the threat of more overflowing
rivers, and budget deficits? I don't believe any of it!

If the Republicans shut down the government, again,
I might not get a Social Security payment next month,
and that will mean that I will not be able to trade in our snow blower
for one of those front-end-loader, diesel things the trains use
to clear their tracks. The fact is that I cannot afford to believe
we will get another couple feet of snow. Our present
snow blower is not designed to reach up that far.

I made a big pot of soup, yesterday, not because I believe
in absurd storms, but because . . . oh, I dunno! . . . maybe
just because there might be a god with a long memory
who knew me when . . . you know! . . . I was having fun.

That pot of soup might be the only chance I have,
not being a believer, and all. . . .

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